The Making of A Mommy

Four years ago as I was nearing the end of my first pregnancy, already on bed rest and anxiously awaiting Ella’s arrival, I watched episode after episode of Bringing Home Baby. Ryan and I took a “baby care basics” class at the hospital and I read book after book about baby care. I remember in the basics class the teacher asked each expectant mother to name one thing we wanted to learn about. My response was giving our baby a bath, wasn’t she going to be slippery and tiny, how was I supposed to keep her from slipping thru my hands and hitting her head? Then when she was born, and I had to really take care of her, a whole new set of questions came up. Is she sleeping enough? Is she eating enough? How many diapers is she going to go thru today? How do I get her dressed without hurting her? How do I clip those tiny fingernails? Should I put a blanket on her or not? The list goes on and on. One at a time, my questions were answered and one at a time another came up. They still do. I am sure they will until my kids have kids of their own.

It does seem easier with Gage, there have been far fewer questions unanswered. Not so much angst. “He is going to sleep a lot the first few weeks”, I told myself. One wet diaper for everyday until he’s 8 days old, and then 8 after that. He’s not going to break if I can’t get his head thru his onesie easily. And I know how to give him a bath…carefully. And even though I constantly have to dig down into my basement of a brain to remember some things, being a Mommy is a lot simpler the second time around. It’s kind of like I’ve been hired to coach the varsity team after a few years experience on the JV team. My team is definitely not undefeated. We still have lots of practice to do, but I definitely have the confidence to lead them to victory on most days.

Dylan is a week old, and I’ve had the pleasure of serving as a special teams coach for Team Kelli during this week. I hope she’ll keep me on as a part time consultant. I love so much to have some of the experience under my belt, and to have the opportunity to share it with my sissy. It has truly been an amazing week, watching Kelli become a mommy. I am ecstatic to know that the next several years of our lives we will be raising our children together. Kelli is my more than my sissy, she is my best friend. I think the true definition of soul mate must be twin sister. So to watch my sissy become a mommy, to watch her love her child is amazing. On days when I’m down, Kell always tells me I’m such a good Mommy. And usually on those days, I doubt her. But I think I know now what she must see. The same thing that I see in her. The questions she ponders because she wants to make sure she is doing it right. The concern that she has for every drop of milk. The fear she has of getting him dressed. What she might not realize yet, is that every question she asks is just proof of what a good Mommy she already is. And that the making of a Mommy wouldn’t be complete without them.